It can be awkward to tell someone they have toilet paper stuck to their shoe, or that they have a piece of food stuck in their teeth. Sometimes we just avoid pointing it out.
Yet wouldn’t you always want to know if you were the actor in such an unfortunate situation? (Especially going into a job interview, right?) So why is it that we don’t consistently show the same kindness to others? What are we afraid of?
Job Seekers MUST Get Candid Feedback
In order to fix what is broken, job seekers need this candid feedback. But who will give it to them? Certainly not the interviewer. They see too much at risk legally. Or, it is just too difficult. Let’s not expect the potential employer to give this feedback. It would be nice, but it isn’t going to happen. The work around is to ask people you trust for their support.
- Role play your interview with someone who can evaluate you. Here are questions to practice answering (or these).
- Give people permission to critique or evaluate how you present yourself.
- Ask past colleagues for their evaluation of how you were to work with (the good, bad and ugly, please).
It Doesn’t Stop Once You Get A Job
Most of us crave feedback, especially Gen Y (twenty-somethings). We want to know how we are doing and deep down inside, we do want to know if people think we are screwing up.
First, you don’t have to be a supervisor, manager, or “leader” to provide feedback. Peer feedback is just as valuable, sometimes more.
I read a post that did a great job of addressing this very issue on HBR “Love, Trust, and Candor: Today’s Management Priorities.”
Jordan Cohen sites several corporate leaders who believe in trust and candor and embed it in their core principles of leadership. He says:
The realization that — with a foundation of trust — candid conversations (both positive and negative) can be shared quickly and easily with tremendous results laid the stage for what has become a lifelong practice of sharing quick observations with colleagues and family members.
Assume Positive Intent
I also believe in candor or as I like to call it tough love. So often I see behaviors or actions that are damaging to the individual I am newly acquainted with. While I don’t have the luxury of always being able to establish trust, I feel compelled to provide candid feedback. I can only hope that the positive intent is assumed in the message. I can and will continue to share my observations, opinions and beliefs in order to help someone be the best they can be.
I can only wonder how different our society, workplace, or home life could be if we all took the time and energy to provide and accept feedback based on the assumption of positive intent.
So, would you tell a complete stranger they had toilet paper on their shoe? Have you delivered a difficult message to someone? How was it received?
For this post, YouTern thanks our friends at Career Sherpa!
About the Author: Hannah Morgan brings over 10 years of experience helping displaced workers search for their next opportunity, and has developed and delivered workshops as well as managed the implementation of Career Navigator, a five-day intensive boot camp for professional level job seekers.
In addition to her blog, Career Sherpa, Hannah is honored to be designated as Job Search Navigator on Job-Hunt.org as well as a featured blogger on HerRochester. She also contributes to Career Collective, a community of expert career coaches and resume writing professionals who write monthly on job search topics, and guest blogs for Brand-Yourself.com on social media trends and tools. Follow Hannah on Twitter!
